The Sweatshop of Love Blog

Without getting into the exact definition of what  hipster is, and assuming that pretty much anyone between the ages of 18-40 living in Chicago and Brooklyn is a hipster, I bring to you seven specific terrible hipster fashion observations I’ve made after living in Chicago for seven years and Brooklyn this week.

Please understand, also, that based on these very liberal perimeters I am a Chicago hipster through and through. I love us hipsters, however fashionably misguided.

1. Hipster Boys are Generally the Same Everywhere, except for

a. Shorts

Gossip Girl Shorts Douche

You will never see a respectable Chicago hipster in short plaid shorts. Or, god forbid, SHORT SHORTS. I don’t have the stomach to post a picture of the short short clad hipster men rolling around Williamsburg. It’s not that hot, y’all. I can see your balls.

b. Newsboy Pants

Billabong Meets Skinny Jeans

It’s like male Brooklyn hipsters decided skinny girl jeans were cool around their ankles, but their junk needed A LOT more room. These pants are sometimes jean, sometimes like sweatpants, sometimes (god help us) PLAID, but always ugly. They are belted high. No one in Chicago will ever wear these, thank you very much.

2. While Female Chicago Hipsters Try to Look Attractive, Female Brooklyn Hipsters Try to Look as Unattractive as Possible.

Tiny Shorts, Big Shirt

Big Top Tiny Shorts

Every girl in Brooklyn looks like this. Or, more accurately, this, plus 20-60 pounds. These twig girls don’t look good in this. I weigh 134 pounds at 5′ 6 1/2″ and I wouldn’t look good in this.

Hipsters in Chicago love high waisted skirts and vintage dresses. We like being cute. Hipsters in Brooklyn love looking like they are wearing underwear and their fat father’s dirty t-shirts.

High Waisted Big Skirt, Tiny Top

Brooklyn Hipsters: If you flip it and reverse it, and put this big on the bottom and the tiny on the top, it works MUCH BETTER! Every girl in Chicago looks like this. Because it’s cute.

3. Hipsters in Brooklyn are VERY worried about ankle safety.

Ankle. Collar. Sandals. <- Not my words

I’ve seen these in Chicago worn by fancy hipsters, yes. In Brooklyn EVERY hipster wears these.

I don’t think I could wear anything indicating my feet need a collar. Because my feet don’t need a collar.

Diaper Shorts and Ankle Collar Sandals

Ignore the diaper shorts for now. ::shudder:: Just… ignore this girl totally. We’ll come back to her. Often. Somebody explain to me how these sandals are cute. They cut your legs off in the WORST place, making you look short. If it’s cold enough that you want your ankles covered, wear boots. Or socks! If it’s hot enough that you need your entire food exposed, you don’t…

Never mind. Just. Forget it. I’m chalking this one up to woman can’t be explained and moving on.

4. Female Brooklyn Hipsters LOVE Airing Out Their Junk.

a. The Harem Pant

Just Your Typical Harem Pants

So you look the same coming and going! These, along with the ankle collar sandals, are in Chicago but worn by fancy hipsters and fancy people. Which, almost makes it worse.

Everyone here wears these! Fancy rich people, hipsters, and tourists. I’ve seen more harem pants this week in NYC than in the entirety of the rest of life.

b. The Harem Short

Harem/Diaper Shorts

(Also See Above Ankle Collar Picture)

I didn’t even know these existed before coming to Brooklyn. I have one statement: IF IT MAKES THE 80 POUND MODEL LOOK LIKE SHE’S WEARING A DIAPER, JUST IMAGINE WHAT IT WILL DO FOR YOU! Again, have never seen these in Chicago. And believe me, I would have noticed.

c. The Granny Harem Pant

Wide Leg Granny Harem Pant

Because harem pants aren’t big enough! These are everywhere in Brooklyn.

Imagine this pant as a skirt. Cute, right? Still a little heavy, but wearable. But this is not a skirt. This is pants. This. Is pants. Only in Brooklyn. And on Disney’s Aladdin.

d. The Dress Harem Pant

Dress Up Harem Pant

How can you wear sweat pants on a date or in the office? Call them DRESS HAREM PANTS. Again, all over NYC. Fancy hipsters, bum hipsters, fancy NYC ladies.

See that look on her face? That is the same look I have on my face looking at this picture! Camaraderie.

e. The Military Style Harem Pant

Military Style Harem Pant

Because your hips can never get enough room. .. ? What?! You look like Napoleon. Or a German WWI soldier. In a bad way. Again, never in Chicago. Unless we are participating in some kind of battle reenactment.

5. Chicago Hipsters Love Rompers! Not So Much in Brooklyn.

Kinda Cute Purple Romper

I’m not big into rompers but they are on every hipster in Chicago. Maybe Brooklyn already went through their romper stage and every hipster here is over them, but I haven’t seen a single romper around these parts.

To this I’m going to have to say point to Chicago. If I was forced by gunpoint to wear a romper or harem pants I would chose the romper. Please don’t tell anyone I wouldn’t choose death.

6. Hipsters Psychotically Love Fedora Style Hats in Brooklyn.

Hipster Fedora Hat

Every hipster in Brooklyn owns this hat. You can see Ed Westwick in the top picture wearing one, and Diaper Harem Pant with Ankle Collar Sandal’s girl has one on, too.

I have so many other beefs with Brooklyn hipsters that I’m going to let this one slide. They are fine, as far as hats go, and I can see Chicago hipsters embracing this hat, too.

7. Brooklyn Hipsters Love Bras/Boobs

Loose Oversized Tank with Bra

Maybe it’s just because it’s super hot here now, but I’ve seen so many bras this week! Very loose tank tops worn over short shorts or leggings and a bra is real big in Brooklyn. Call it my Midwestern sensibilities, but I’m positive tank tops in your size work just the same as really big tank tops.

Chicago hipsters show their bras off, too. But usually it’s a shoulder strap here, a back strap there, never full on cup showing in the armhole of your tank top. Chicago hipsters might run into their mothers, or bosses. Or, neighbors. Or brothers. Or an old college professor. A good Midwesterner doesn’t want strangers seeing their bra! It’s inappropriate!

The major difference here is simple: Chicago hipsters want to be cute. We are freaking cutesy, many times to a fault. Like, how are you going to explain that hamster tattoo to your grandkids? Where Chicago hipsters over-cute, Brooklyn hipsters under-cute. It’s like everyone in Brooklyn wears costumes for my amusement. And they are in a costume contest to see who can look the worst. And they are all winning.

I could, and probably will, write about how cute everyone is here, too. This is a summary of the worst Brooklyn hipsters have to offer. There is a lot of it. And I’m enjoying every minute of it.

All summer I’m going to feature guest bloggers talking about knitting and other crafty pursuits. Last week Jeanna talked about her adventures in knitting, and today I’ve got Marissa from the fun fashion blog Marissa Explains It All. Not only does she rock some sweet store-bought style, she works her own handmade pieces into her everyday wardrobe, too.

To inspire us I asked her to share a couple of her handmade dresses styled in different ways. Because once you make something you want to wear it as often as possible!

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Hey bloggers! I’m Marissa from Marissa Explains It All. I’ve been asked by Allyson do to a little guest post on The Sweatshop of Love! I was so excited when Allyson contacted me about doing a guest post on my handmade clothing that I have and how I style it. I’m newer at making my own clothing so I’m very proud of something when I first make it and try to style it as many ways as I can so I can show of my new handmade pieces!

I took two of my dresses that I’ve made (which are the easiest to make by the way, especially if there’s no sleeves!) and styled them two different ways so I can show you guys how I use the dresses with more than way.

Dress One: I made when I was still in high school close to three years ago, it was my first real piece of clothing I made on my own, and I still love it to this day. Now the dress is really summery so I wanted to show how I would wear it in the summer and in the winter. Anything you own can be styled for both seasons even though they are so different.

Handmade Dress for Summer!

Handmade Dress for Winter!

For winter I paired the dress with all black, even though the dress is a light color black makes it look more for winter. The tights help when its cold and so does the cardigan and boots. Add tights and a cardigan to your homemade pieces and it will make anything work in the cold weather!

Dress Two: I made this dress last semester at my university in my sewing class, it was a lot more of a challenge with inserting my first zipper, gathering, making straps and more! I’m in love with it but I picked a fabric that is a little more dressy. I wanted to show how to style a dressier outfit down for a more casual look.

Handmade Dress Looking Fancy!

Handmade Dress Looking Casual!

To make the dress more casual again I added a cardigan, a big purse and some switched the heels out for flats. Dressier looks always can be casual when wearing cardigans and flats it adds a more laid back look to your dressy outfit and makes it perfect for going to class or out to lunch!

I hope this helps when thinking about your next homemade piece of clothing! Go for the summer fabric or dressier fabric and remember that you can wear it all year long!

lovelove, M.

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Thanks so much for taking time out to write this post, Marissa! Please show her some love by commenting and sharing her post! And be sure to click over to Marissa Explains it All and say hi!

Tomorrow is World Wide Knit in Public Day! I hope you all have fun knitting outside related plans lined up. If you living in Chicago I hope you are planning on knitting (and drinking!) with us at Street Side tomorrow at 4pm.

Have you seen the blog New Dress a Day? Marisa takes weirdo clothes she thrifts and turns them into super fun, modern dresses with a little cutting and sewing.

Big Button Front Dress

She inspired me to fix up this old clunker. I picked this silky, HUGE, button up, belted number on half price Saturday a while ago thinking I could just cut the top off and make it a cute skirt. But it’s been sitting in my sewing pile for months and months.

New Dress A Day motivated me to make this a little bit more special. I cut the gigantic sleeves off, then cut it across at the bottom of the armpit holes. I peeled off the bottom portions of the front pockets. (WHY would you put front pockets on a woman’s dress?)

Then I rolled the top down to make an elastic casing, slid some elastic in there, and voila!

Oohh CUTE!

Totally wearable summer dress! The empire waist is super flattering, the skirt is full and fun, and the the elastic I added at the top of the dress is comfortable.

Ready to Party!

This dress worked really well because the skirt didn’t need to be altered at all. The striped design is fun and can stand on it’s own. Because the top of the dress was vertically striped, the contrast is natural and flattering in any capacity.

Fake Buttons, Serious Elastic

I left a couple of the buttons on, just for fun. They don’t do anything – I sewed up both sides of the button band – but it’s a fun detail.

Kinda Like PJs!

So, before it looked like an old fashioned prison dress, and now it looks like a fun party dress! Thanks, Marisa, for the inspiration! Have you been inspired by a blog you read lately?

Very rarely do I watch rising temperatures with dread. I love hot weather! But my plan of wearing the Built by Wendy Mini Dress I made a few weeks ago to Colleen’s wedding tomorrow flew out the window when I noticed an 82 degree forecast! Tights and 82 degrees just don’t mix, and that dress is too short to be running around in without tights on underneath.

Luckily I’ve got options. Too many options. That is where you come in! Please help me pick a dress to wear tomorrow!

The Deal: It’s a Catholic wedding with a not super stuffy reception at a country club in the Chicago burbs later in the evening.

1. Vintage Rose Butterfly Top Dress

Vintage Rose Dress

Vintage Rose Dress

I ran across this dress in a thrift store and snagged it for $6. It’s really flattering and fun! I’m not super excited about the color, but I think it grows on you.

From the Back

The back is just as pretty as the front!

Close Up of Front

2. Vintage Red Ruffle Dress

Vintage Red Ruffle Dress

Vintage Red Ruffle Dress

I got this dress years and years ago at Ragstock and pull it out every now and then because it’s so fun! Again, it’s super flattering and I love the bright red.

From the Back

The ruffle continues around the back and the belt ties in the back.

Fun Top Ruffles!

I don’t know what the rules are, but in the interest of full disclosure I wore this dress to a wedding about four years ago and that couple is totally divorced now. I’d hate to blame the dress, but it might have some bad wedding karma?

3. Vintage Navy Belted Dress

Vintage Navy Belted Dress

Vintage Navy Belted Dress

Not as flashy as the first two, this dress is still one of my favorites. I picked it up last year at a yard sale for $5 and it fit so perfectly when I got home that I didn’t take it off for three days.

It’s classy and flattering and silky and simple. And needs a good ironing.

From the Back

It also, apparently, makes my ass look smokin’!

Front Gathers

And there you have it! Three very warm weather appropriate dresses. Which one should I wear?