Felicity debuted when I was a freshmen in high school. She was a freshman in college that first season and I thought Felicity was like a gimps four years into my future. And what did I have to look forward to? Getting to choose which cute boy to love: Ben or Noel.
You ask a girl around my age ‘Ben or Noel?’ and she immediately knows what you are talking about. I can’t even begin to count how many conversations I’ve had with girls where they compare the two boys they are dating to Ben and Noel. Or compare their boyfriend to Noel and the boy they have a crush on to Ben.
It’s simple, really. Noel is the cute nerd you love spending time with and hanging out with and doing everything with who loves the crap out of you and who you are supposed to marry and love forever. Ben is the sexy asshole with the heart of gold who will beat someone up in a bar if they look at you funny, but then forget your birthday. He is the boy you think you can save and he is just nice enough to you, pays just enough attention to you, to get you to love him but be mostly miserable. And he does love you, he is just a boy. Whereas Noel would drop everything for you any time you called him.
Ben
Season one, which I have been re-watching this week for the 100th time, ends with Felicity torn: Noel, who she was dating before she cheated on him but of course he is still in love with her, invites her to go to Germany with him for the summer because he got a smarty pants graphic designer internship, and it wouldn’t be the same without her. Siigh.
Ben, though, just broke up with Julie (Felicity’s best friend) because he realized after all this time that he loves Felicity and wants her to drive across the country with him to start the summer. He is taking the trip by himself anyway, but it wouldn’t be the same without her.
When that episode first aired I was like, ‘SHE HAS TO GO WITH NOEL HE IS SO CUTE AND NICE AND SWEET AND THE BEST BOYFRIEND EVER!’ My mom, though, said to me, ‘She has to pick Ben because it is more interesting. Season two would be boring if she spent the summer with Noel.’
That sentence has stuck with me in the worst way possible. I’ve dated Noels and have been in love with Bens my whole life. In a subconscious effort not to be boring, to make season two way more interesting, I break up with Noel and date Ben, only to get pissed and sad, and then I stop talking to all boys.
Noel
Last scene of season one is Felicity in a cab. The camera is far away so you can’t tell what she says to the cab driver. Is she meeting Noel at the airport? Or is she going over to Ben’s apartment where he is waiting for her?
We had to wait all summer to find out.
Season one came out on DVD when I was a freshmen in college. One of my friends bought it, and we watched the entire thing in one weekend. I have this great picture somewhere of me and five other girls in our pajamas, holding the Felicity boxes, making sad faces after finishing all 22 episodes, and four pizzas.
We debated. I’ve debated this issue forever. You answer depends on your life. When I am happily dating a Noel, I of course would go with Noel to Germany. When I am not happily dating a Noel and getting fucked around by a Ben, I of course would go with Ben.
Felicity goes with Ben. Then Ben, in true Ben fashion, takes a job in Mexico for the rest of the summer, leaving Felicity in California all by herself, then, when they are back in school, tells her he doesn’t want a girlfriend.
At the end of the series she ends up with Ben, but after four years of putting up with his bullshit. He cheats on her, he has a baby with a different woman, he is an alcoholic, he has a gambling problem, he almost fails out of school a bunch of times, her parents hate him.
Is it worth it? We love Bens, we can’t help it. But, if she would have just stuck with Noel and been a little bored, wouldn’t she be ultimately happier?
So. Which is it? Ben or Noel?
this conundrum is why i am perpetually single.
Comment by t — August 3, 2009 @ 1:20 pm
I’m hoping you find the middle ground, a Boel, if you will, (Nen?) during your social experiment so I can leave my house on the weekends hoping I’ll find someone I like talking to more than I like talking to my cats.
… oh shit. That sentence was the beginning of the end.
Comment by allyson — August 3, 2009 @ 1:37 pm
I just introduced this series to a friend of mine who is about to start college. I am watching it with her and my answer is the same today as it was when I first watched about ten years ago…she should have chosen Ben. Ben was what inspired her to move across country and go to school in NY. Ben was always that one elusive guy for her and if she hadn’t chosen to go with him on the road trip she would have always wondered “what if?” and it would have driven her crazy. Even if they got back to school and it never worked out between them at least she would never have been plagued with that doubt. Noel is a sweet, sincere guy, but Ben was always the guy for her. Noel even said it himself, that he would never “inhabit” her the way that Ben did.
Team Ben all the way!
Comment by Peyton — August 17, 2009 @ 1:04 pm
Man! I know you are right.
But Noel! I just want to hug him!
Apparently it is a good thing this wasn’t my problem.
Comment by allyson — August 17, 2009 @ 1:07 pm
Haha, yeah Noel did seem very huggable! But I can’t help it, the whole “bad boy with a heart of gold” thing gets me every time.
Comment by Peyton — August 17, 2009 @ 5:02 pm
the way the show is set up, everything is from Felicity’s perspective. and we the audience know and appreciate how introspective, sensitive and wholesome a person Felicity is. but from Noel’s perspective, Felicity is *such* a jerk. She uses him, treats him badly, doesn’t appreciate him, etc. Felicity never ‘means’ to hurt Noel, but that’s always what happens. does that sound familiar? it’s because Felicity does to Noel what Ben does to Felicity.
and that, I guess, is why Felicity ‘deserves’ Ben, and does not deserve Noel. the fact that she ends up with Ben is totally unrealistic — the Bens of this world always end up alone — but it is for the best, because Noel deserves better, honestly.
maybe this all sounds like I’m not a fan of the show. but I totally am. I love it. I love the characters — though sometimes I wondered if Felicity was really a good person at all, and was not just pretending she was ‘pensive’ and ‘intense’ when she was really just narcissistic and self-absorbed. when I began to think of Felicity as deeply flawed, I began to think of Ben as a better match for her.
Comment by Jenna — October 26, 2010 @ 7:59 am
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Comment by steerdese — January 4, 2011 @ 8:13 am
wow i just started watching this series, i’m still on season 1 but i am absolutely in love with Noel. He’s just so selfless and he actually cares y’no?
Ben, oth seems like a total douche. So he’s a little confused and messed up and comes from a rubbish family- lol n that app. means he treats felicity however he feels like that day- 2am visits n then ignoring her like she’s some crazy fan girl who followed him to uni
But then again.. can i say i’m still deciding?
Comment by TJ — February 23, 2011 @ 5:57 pm
I couldn’t agree more with Jenna. I’ve just rewatched season 1 and I do think Felicity is not a good person or, in Julie’s words, just a “lying bitch”. You see, she says she has known people who became so important to her (now talking about her best girl friend – Julie – and her boyfriend/best guy friend – Noel). I would never, ever consider hurting the two most important people in my life the way she did by choosing the road trip with Ben. C’mon, it had been 1 week since he had broken up with Julie. And after what happened with Eli, she just let Noel down again.
She is a really selfish, self-centered, despicable girl.
I guess she had these teenage dreams about Ben and I’m glad he let her down so many times too, because she more than deserved it. I can say I like the actress performance and that all these conflicts are essential to the show, but I’d never want to be friends with someone like that, a real problem-person.
Comment by Dena — May 17, 2011 @ 10:43 am
Team Noel. All the way. Noels are the kind of guys that are loyal and love you no matter what. If you want a fling date a Ben. If you want a relationship date a Noel.
Comment by Tara — October 23, 2011 @ 7:57 pm
I agree with Tara. Team NOEL!!
Comment by Stephine — December 16, 2011 @ 3:26 am
I’m with Tara also….Team Noel! Ben just jerked her around and made her unhappy most of the time. That guy is too much drama. Have your fling with him and be done…when marry NOEL!Ben would only cheat on her over and over again.
Comment by Tina — January 21, 2012 @ 12:37 am
As an audience member it’s easy to see things from Felicity’s perspective. While watching the show, kind of like Felicity, I find myself yo-yo-ing between Noel and Ben. First season: Pick Noel. First half of season 2: Pick Noel. Second half of of Season 2: Pick Ben. First half of Season Three: Pick Ben. Second half of season 3: Pick Noel. I’ll start re-watching season 4 soon, so we’ll see who I ultimately want her to be with. Well anyway, my point is that it’s easy to see why she’s torn between the two. In season one, I wanted her to pick Noel. BUT I knew she would pick Ben because who wouldn’t? No one wants to live with a “what if” their whole life. That said, from memory I always thought it was Noel who she should have chosen. I saw the whole time travel thing as a metaphor for real life. How many of us get a great opportunity, or meet the perfect guy only to make the wrong choice? How many of us realize the “Noel” was the one you really wanted but too late? Felicity, like most of us, has to live with her choices. And she chose Ben. He may have a heart of gold, but he’s always going to be a risk. Noel would have treated her like a queen.
Comment by AT — February 7, 2012 @ 7:37 pm
Ben, ben, ben. All four seasons. Season 1, I dont blame him for not wanting felicity, hes barely 18/19 and as far as he knows it, shes just a fuel who is infactuated by him. in the end he starts to get to know how deep she is. Season 2, hes still confuse about commitment but in three end he make up for it. Season 3, come on ben is perfect. Season 4, felicity cheated …how could he not be angry, I don’t blame him for lauren. however the claire thing was wrong, I still like him more than noel though, to me noel is too possessive and judgmental.
Comment by Ai — April 16, 2012 @ 6:15 pm
I have been sick and started the show from season 1. I watched his show some right after I graduated highs school in ’00. But never became devoted (dawson was my show). I however found the timing to watching it now to be perfect. At 18 I wouldn’t have understood the depth in the whole storyline as I do now. My take is that we fall in love with the idea possibility. This young and naive girl, taking chances and living on heart alone. She was the bashful innocent virgin I was, hopeless for that guy you never really got to love. Ben turns out to be all about Ben, with no depth. That jock that has little else to offer. Noel then becomes the hero. The guy to love because he is in love with her from the start. He is the good one. The adult. The guy who had only been with his high school GF. The guy who is nervous at the very mention of your name and pines for you. When she chose the road trip with Ben, you felt angry, because you knew what was going to happen. This jock guy wanted to have fun with a girl he liked… vs. A man who truly loved her. Her heart was about to break. But, She had to choose Ben like you all said, she had to follow the wonder of what if. As time passes Ben hurts her as expected and has a jock fling while Felicity gets to know herself through other men. My heart dropped as she held her hand to the cab window waiving Noel goodbye… like oh no, they have such a love, get out of the cab! But then magic from nowhere, Ben starts to face himself and shows that he has more depth then we knew, that he is capable of such love and time told us he could be trusted. Thats when it was sealed: It has to be Ben. Their season 2 ending was one of the best moments of all time. You cry with them as they say goodbye. It was real. As time went on, every obstacle they got through made them stronger. But when she cheated, I became angry with the hypocrite that is felicty with her trust. The mantle she made as the center of her and Ben. Meanwhile I started to dislike Noel, as a flakey male slut that made Ben the stable, strong, protective guy. The one we all fall for, cause he’d yes fight for you, and always seems to love in the face of pain. He grew up. Felicity didn’t deserve him, but like Bens father said, its a test, real love makes it. So team Ben!!!!! No doubt. and he’s hot. Like put him on a spoon please.!
Comment by ashley — May 29, 2012 @ 12:00 am
This question is so easy. WHO DID SHE LOVE? If you truly watched the entire series, you know the answer. How many times did she say to Noel that she loved him? Zero but she told Ben she loved him plenty of times. Remember, right after she slept with Noel. What was it she said to Noel while she was trying to hide the hickey? HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? I MEAN, I LOVE BEN. Felicity always looked at Noel as a close friend, but she loved Ben her whole life. When she was talking to Ruby in the Cafeteria she said. I knew Ben from High School, and I always thought that if we knew each other, we would love each other.
Comment by hanna — September 11, 2012 @ 8:34 pm
I just started watching this show and I have to say that I was totally Team Noel….but that was before Felicity and Ben got together. I personally believe that everyone has one great love. There will always be people that you find yourself falling in love with, but you can only find ONE great love. Ben is Felicity’s one great love. There’s just something about the way they are around each other; you can tell that through all of their bullshit fights and arguments that they really love each other. Even after all the obstacles along the way, they always find their way back to each other. And for God’s sakes, FELICITY FOLLOWED BEN TO NEW YORK!!!! Not many people can make you completely change everything you thought you knew about yourself. Ben was just that person for her. Noel is that guy that you’ll always love, but that you’re not IN love with.
Comment by Tally — January 23, 2013 @ 2:34 pm
I just found Felicity on Netflix, and I’m glad someone else just commented on this nearly four year old post just last month! (Or I wouldn’t have bothered.)
The first time Felicity aired I was just out of college. I was so into the show that I even posted on that forum, The Contemptuous Sardonic Felicity Watcher’s Society. Yeah. I was AngieAngelique. The site is long gone, but my old comments are probably lurking somewhere on the internet.
Full disclosure: I stopped watching after the second season. It had nothing to do with her hair (but I agree that hair cut was ugly – Felicity was gorgeous despite that awful haircut). The story-line became lame. I felt the story was more suited to a movie than a 4-season drama. After two seasons I just wanted Felicity to make a decision already!
And now that I’m watching the second season for the second time nearly 15 years later, I have to say, the plot-devices are so contrived (One of the dorms is condemned. Surprise! Megan and Felicity are co-RA roommates again!). Contrived plot-devices are common in the YA genre I guess.
Like Sean. I like Sean, but at the beginning of season two I wanted to tell him to butt out of Ben’s love-life already!
I’m watching the episodes where Sean keeps telling Ben to break up with Felicity because he didn’t feel Ben could deal with Felicity’s intensity. Sean may have been right, but he should have just let Ben discover that on his own.
And then Sean justified his meddling by saying he was so much older and wiser than Ben. But he wasn’t wise enough to realize that inviting Ben’s ex-girlfriend (Julie) to live with them was NOT a good idea. And then Julie, deciding that it would be less awkward to live with her ex than a couple of quirky cheerleaders didn’t make any sense to me either. (Surprise! Ben and Julie are living together!)
During season one I couldn’t remember why I didn’t like Julie. I like Julie the second time I watched season one. But the second time watching season two, I remembered why I disliked Julie. She milked the “righteous but wronged woman” role way too much.
And I was on team Ben. But I thought the second time I watched, I would be rooting for Noel. However, I’m noticing an attraction between Felicity and Ben, even during season one, when Felicity was dating Noel and Ben was dating Julie. I see they way they look at each other. I didn’t notice those looks back then. Back then I wanted Ben because I thought he was sexier, but would have eventually admitted that Noel was the better guy if pushed.
Fifteen years later this is how my perception changed.
The first time, I thought the writers originally planned for Felicity and Noel to get together. He seemed like marriage material. I thought the writers changed course based on the comments from The Contemptuous Sardonic Felicity Watcher’s Society, which seemed to lean towards Ben.
Now, I am convinced the writers planned for Felicity and Ben to get together all along.
Comment by Angie — February 15, 2013 @ 4:50 pm
I’m watching this series for the first time. After scanning the comments I see my worst fear is true: The series ends with Ben and Felicity together.
I’d prefer she end up with Noel. He’s a sweetheart and is deeply in love with Felicity. Ben’s done nothing but treat her like trash.
As I get deeper into the final season I question why I’m even watching it, having had a strong feeling of the ending. At this point I think I’m doing it to find out what happens to everyone but Felicity and Ben.
This is probably the most disappointing series I’ve ever watched.
Comment by sprite — April 2, 2013 @ 12:48 am